Home – The Basis For a Righteous Life

Gordon B. Hinckley said, “The more surely you rear your children in the ways of the gospel of Jesus Christ, with love and high expectation, the more likely that there will be peace in their lives.” Chapter 11, Home – The Basis for a Righteous Life, is a loving reminder that teaching and rearing our children in the principles of the gospel is our God-given responsibility. As I studied this lesson, the word peace caught my attention. It truly is in teaching and living the gospel of Jesus Christ that our children will have the greatest chance of finding peace and stability in an ever-changing, commotion-filled world.  Consider these things President Hinckley taught about gospel living and peace:

  • I know of no other practice that will have so salutary an effect upon your lives as will the practice of kneeling together in prayer. … Your daily conversations with him will bring peace into your hearts and a joy into your lives that can come from no other source.
  • [The Lord] expects us to have family home evening—one night a week to gather our children together and teach them the gospel. Isaiah said, “And all thy children shall be taught of the Lord.” That is the commandment: “All thy children shall be taught of the Lord.” And the blessing: “And great,” he said, “shall be the peace of thy children.” (Isa. 54:13)1
  • I urge our people everywhere to read the scriptures more. … May the Lord bless each of us to feast upon his holy word and to draw from it that strength, that peace, that knowledge “which passeth all understanding” (Philip. 4:7), as he has promised.2
  • So lead your sons and daughters, so guide and direct them from the time they are very small, so teach them in the ways of the Lord, that peace will be their companion throughout life.

Russell M. Nelson has said, “No other work transcends that of righteous, intentional parenting!”3 I love the clarity he gives to us that our parenting must be intentional. It takes conscious effort! If we are not careful, other things occupy our time and energy without our even being aware. We’ve been warned often about that.


“When things of the world crowd in, all too often the wrong things take highest priority. Then it is easy to forget the fundamental purpose of life. Satan has a powerful tool to use against good people. It is distraction. He would have good people fill life with ‘good things’ so there is no room for the essential ones. Have you unconsciously been caught in that trap?” Richard G. Scott4


“It is of particular importance in our day, when Satan is raging in the hearts of men in so many new and subtle ways, that our choices and decisions be made carefully, consistent with the goals and objectives by which we profess to live. We need unequivocal commitment to the commandments and strict adherence to sacred covenants. … It is heartbreaking when we profess belief in these goals yet neglect the everyday conduct required to achieve them.” Quentin L. Cook5


“Sad to say, we even wear our busyness as a badge of honor, as though being busy, by itself, was an accomplishment or sign of a superior life. … If we fail to give our best personal self and undivided time to those who are truly important to us, one day we will regret it.” Dieter F. Uchtdorf6


“Sometimes we feel that the busier we are, the more important we are—as though our busyness defines our worth. Brothers and sisters, we can spend a lifetime whirling about at a feverish pace, checking off list after list of things that in the end really don’t matter. That we do a lot may not be so important. That we focus the energy of our minds, our hearts, and our souls on those things of eternal significance—that is essential.” Joseph B. Wirthlin7


“If he could have his way, Satan … would have us become involved in a million and one things in this life—probably none of which are very important in the long run—to keep us from concentrating on the things that are really important, particularly the reality that we are God’s children. He would like us to forget about home and family values. He’d like to keep us so busy with comparatively insignificant things that we don’t have time to make the effort to understand where we came from, whose children we are, and how glorious our ultimate homecoming can be!” Marvin J. Ashton8


We must never forget that both we and our children are children of God! President Hinckley gives us some very wise counsel, “You need heaven’s help in raising heaven’s child—your child, who is also the child of his or her Heavenly Father.” Intentional parenting includes making our family a priority by inviting heaven’s help as we strive to live the gospel together.


Spencer W. Kimball cautioned, “When we kneel in family prayer, our children at our side on their knees are learning habits that will stay with them all through their lives. If we do not take time for prayers, what we are actually saying to our children is, ‘Well, it isn’t very important, anyway. We won’t worry about it. If we can do it conveniently, we will have our prayer, but if the school bell rings and the bus is coming and employment is calling—well, prayer isn’t very important and we will do it when it is convenient.’ Unless planned for, it never seems to be convenient. No mother would carelessly send her little children forth to school on a wintry morning without warm clothes to protect against the snow and rain and cold. But there are numerous fathers and mothers who send their children to school without the protective covering available to them through prayer—a protection against exposure to unknown hazards, evil people, and base temptations. In the past, having family prayer once a day may have been all right. But in the future it will not be enough if we are going to save our families.” (Italics added)9


James E. Faust quoted that last sentence in his general conference talk nearly thirty years ago and then added, “I wonder if having casual and infrequent family home evening will be enough in the future to fortify our children with sufficient moral strength. In the future, infrequent family scripture study may be inadequate to arm our children with the virtue necessary to withstand the moral decay of the environment in which they will live. Where in the world will the children learn chastity, integrity, honesty, and basic human decency if not at home?”10


Surely the “in the future” President Faust spoke of was today! Oh how I wish I could go back to when my children were young and do a better job! And I am sure I am not alone! In fact, I find great comfort in Russell M. Nelson’s words, “Years ago the First Presidency stressed the importance of quality family time. They wrote: ‘We call upon parents to devote their best efforts to the teaching and rearing of their children in gospel principles which will keep them close to the Church. The home is the basis of a righteous life, and no other instrumentality can take its place or fulfill its essential functions in carrying forward this God-given responsibility. We counsel parents and children to give highest priority to family prayer, family home evening, gospel study and instruction, and wholesome family activities. However worthy and appropriate other demands or activities may be, they must not be permitted to displace the divinely-appointed duties that only parents and families can adequately perform.’ When I ponder this counsel, I almost wish I were a young father once again.”3


So, we do our best and pray for heaven’s help. Still, one of the great heartaches for parents is when children, young and sometimes not so young, seem to abandon what they have been taught. President Hinckley encourages, “Once in a while, notwithstanding all the things you try to do, there is a rebellious child. But keep at it. Do not ever give up. You have never lost as long as you try. Keep at it.”


Jeffrey R. Holland, in his ever-loving, always-encouraging way, teaches, “Some children will make choices that break their parents’ hearts. Moms and dads can do everything right and yet have children who stray. Moral agency still obtains. But even in such painful hours it will be comforting for you to know that your children knew of your abiding faith in Christ, in His true Church, in the keys of the priesthood and in those who hold them. It will be comforting then for you to know that if your children choose to leave the straight and narrow way, they leave it very conscious that their parents were firmly in it. Furthermore, they will be much more likely to return to that path when they come to themselves and recall the loving example and gentle teachings you offered them there. Live the gospel as conspicuously as you can. Keep the covenants your children know you have made. Give priesthood blessings. And bear your testimony! Don’t just assume your children will somehow get the drift of your beliefs on their own. Keep loving and keep testifying. Keep praying. Those prayers will be heard and answered in the most unexpected hour. God will send aid to no one more readily than He will send it to a child—and to the parent of a child.”11


We know that Satan seeks to destroy peace—especially in the family. Prophets and apostles have warned us for many years about these attacks and how we can guard against them. In 1995, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints issued The Family – A Proclamation to the World. President Hinckley read that proclamation as part of his talk to the women of the Church. He said, “With so much of sophistry that is passed off as truth, with so much of deception concerning standards and values, with so much of allurement and enticement to take on the slow stain of the world, we have felt to warn and forewarn. In furtherance of this we of the First Presidency and the Council of the Twelve Apostles now issue a proclamation to the Church and to the world as a declaration and reaffirmation of standards, doctrines, and practices relative to the family which the prophets, seers, and revelators of this church have repeatedly stated throughout its history.” He then read the family proclamation.  He continued, “We commend to all a careful, thoughtful, and prayerful reading of this proclamation. The strength of any nation is rooted within the walls of its homes. We urge our people everywhere to strengthen their families in conformity with these time-honored values.”12


May we accept President Hinckley’s challenge to prayerfully, carefully and thoughtfully read and study the family proclamation and conform our lives to the values taught in this prophetic proclamation. As we do, we will feel heaven’s help as we are doing the heavenly work of raising God’s children.

References:

  1.  Family Home Evening – Gordon B. Hinckley

  2.  Feasting Upon The Scriptures – Gordon B. Hinckley

  3.  The Sabbath is a Delight – Russell M. Nelson

  4.  First Things First – Richard G. Scott

  5.  Choose Wisely – Quentin L. Cook

  6.  Of Regrets and Resolutions – Dieter F. Uchtdorf

  7.  Follow Me – Joseph B. Wirthlin

  8.  A Yearning For Home – Marvin J. Ashton

  9.  Prayer, The Passport to Spiritual Power – Spencer W. Kimball

10.  The Greatest Challenge in the World—Good Parenting – James E. Faust

11.  A Prayer for the Children – Jeffrey R. Holland

12.  Stand Strong Against the Wiles of the World – Gordon B. Hinckley

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